Soliloquy

Sisyphus is having trouble rolling out of bed
Too many rocks growing inside his head

Observers gather round to philosophize
Like moss o’er the dead at sunrise

Oblomov laughs at his decided sloth
While the rest chase an elusive moth

Some they walk without crutches or illusions
I need something pretty to hang over my confusion

When the water is right, the tea bag always knows when
poor Confucius is only human, gets scalded again.

It’s not love you want; it’s the dream you want to hold;
The horizon is a pinada waiting to explode

Goodies will fall as Chicken Little waves his wand
Pieces of the puzzled sky presaging the beyond

Love is rather a dagger that stands before thee
In one of your softest soliloquies.

Your new perm is lovely but hardly permanent
Nothing firm about the firmament;

The moonlight becomes your fluffy hair;
Let me taste your cotton candy and get stuck there;

Shall I compare thee to the nighttime sky?
Your radiance makes the pale moon sigh

Shall I call you an angel who bored with light
Tried to blow a clay figure back to life?

Shall I blow smoke up your celestial orb?
All pedestals come down in due course;

Such beauty in the things that Shakespeare said
Still not enough to raise the dead;

Stop talking to yourself, put the dagger away;
We’ll attack the horizon on another day;

Let me hide behind my artifice
Beyond the jagged arrows and pricks

That threaten the stars that shoot in my marrow
Where bloodrivers run blue and free of peril.

Barb tries a blog

Barb does wonderful watercolors! See the whole slideshow.

The Weather

Sitting on the cracking steps smoking
a cracked pipe stuffed with the snuff of
what’s left to fall through the holes
skipping rope with Ovid on the steps
of the Parthenon, talking about the weather
Kafka crawls by, staring at his winged shoes,
under the radar decidedly ants blip from the screen
grasshoppers take wing, storming the Colosseum,
The Bastille, Wall Street, too, circling the golden tail
where it’s all been done before; reality shows
snuff films, the rich devouring the poor; that’s
entertainment as it will be once again; fabled
is Aesop for getting it partly right; more fodder
burning for the holy pipe; winged is the grasshopper
who never was idle; busy are the ants building
odes to tomorrow infrastructures against the sun
and other pests of the night who would make them prey
to gods untamed and wild like so much rain
til they become too bloated and explode
from all that false security busy are the
grasshoppers busy tearing down ant illusions
burning modes to the beyond where survival
is in the essence hidden in wood, mortar and stone;
cracked are the steps where Ovid loads the pipe
and we talk about the weather on this burning swirl of a night.

On occasion, Lester Maddox would sign the ax handles sold in his restaurant. They came to symbolize his resistance to the civil rights movement, as he used them to chase off Blacks who tried to come into his restaurant.


Lester, Maynard and Martin

A long waiting room of sorts, populated with the newly dead.
Lester Maddox waits with several other shadowy figures.

The Clerk calls out a name:

Clerk: Mr. Maynard Jackson. The King will see you now.



Jackson gets up; and walks into an office.

Lester: (goes up to the Clerk) Hey! How come he gets to go first?
I’ve been waiting here forever!

Clerk: He got here first, Mr. Maddox. Please be patient. Here at The Content of Your Character, we are Equal Opportunity Employers. The King is looking over your resume.

Lester: I want to see the King now! Do you call this proper treatment for a former governor of Georgia—and the first one from Atlanta, I should add. He’s…that man…
He’s not…well, he’s…

Clerk: He’s what?

Lester: Beneath me!

Clerk: Beneath you?

Maddux: He’s..he’s just a…

Clerk: Yes?

Lester: Mayor.

Clerk: He got here first, Mr. Maddux. Please wait your turn.
Go sit at the back of the room.

Maddux: Reverse discrimination!

Clerk: GO NOW!

Maddux: I WANNA SEE THE KING! MINE EYES HAVE SEEN THE GLORY!
LET ME SEE THE KING!

Martin Luther King, Jr. enters to the sweet music of an angelic choir. His face and wings are aglow.

Lester’s jaw drops.

Maddux: But…but…but….You’re not the King!

Martin: Who were you expecting, Elvis?

Maddux: No, the King of all Kings…

Martin: Ah..well I have spoken with my superiors; and we have perused your resume.

Maddux: No, wait…I want to talk to…I want to talk to..I need to talk to my lawyer.

Martin: There will be plenty of time for that, Lester. Before I tell you our decision, before we grant you your wish, is there anything you’d like to say for yourself?

Lester: Not without a lawyer.

Suddenly several mean looking Angels brandishing axe handles come toward him. He runs wildly until the floor finally caves in under him…he screams as he falls.

Martin: Hmm…what’s the problem, Lester? You’ve finally got your dream of segregation. Who’s next?


RIP, Lester Maddux. RIP, Maynard Jackson. Never rest, Martin.

Presidential Jeopardy



Alex: Thank you for playing Twilight Zone Jeopardy…umm Presidential Jeopardy. You’ve hit the Daily Double, Jim. Choose a category.

Jim: Ok, Alex, I choose Administration Lies for 1,000, Alex.

Alex: Ok…please choose who said the following quote. Hint: It was said during the rehearsal for his UN Presentation: ‘I’m not reading this. This is bullshit.’

They all buzz in.

Alex: Jim?

Jim: Ummm….Bill Clinton! (Virginia buzzes)

Alex: (condescendingly) Jim, Jim, Jim….ok, Virginia?

Virginia: Bill Clinton!

Jim: Umm…no…Albert…

Albert: Who is Bill Clinton?

Jim: No, it is not Bill Clinton. It was Colin Powell.

(The contestants all murmur in astonishment.)

Jim: Well, it must’ve been some nasty propaganda from the left. Or Kofi Annan’s favorite sex positons.

Albert: Or Bill Clinton’s recommendations for interns.

Virginia: Or some twisted French joke.

Alex: Ok, let’s move on. Jim.

Jim: Ok, Alex, Administration Lies for 100.

Alex: ‘I am not a crook. I don’t even know what a crook is.’

They all hit their buzzers.

Alex: Virginia?

Virginia: Who is Bill Clinton?

Alex: Umm..no. Albert?

Albert: Who is William Jefferson Clinton?

Alex: No.

Jim: Who is Hillary Clinton?

Alex: No. He said What is “is.” The answer “is” Richard Nixon.

All the contestants murmur in astonishment.

Jim: Wasn’t he a Republican?

Alex: Yes, Jim.

Jim: He was framed by the Far Left. They broke into their own Democratic headquarters and made it look like he did it.

Virginia: Breaking into a hotel room? What’s the big deal?

Albert: Yes, it’s not like he broke into a hotel room and had unRepublican-like sex with an intern.

Alex: We’ve come a long way, Virginia. Jim?

Jim: Uh…Administration Lies for 200, Alex.

Alex: Who said in Sept of 2000: “the intelligence leaves no doubt that . . . Iraq . . . continues to possess and conceal some of the most lethal weapons ever devised.”

They buzz madly.

Albert: Who is Dubya?

Alex: Yes, Albert…very good.

Jim: Wait, that’s not fair…That was not a lie!

Virginia: Yeah! They just haven’t found them yet!

Jim: They moved them! Looted and burned them!

Virginia: And even if they don’t find them. The Iraqi’s are free from a horrible dictator.
Our troops are much nicer, dress better and have no sinister mustaches.

Alex: Ok, Albert…

Albert: Administration Lies for 300, Alex.

Alex: Who proclaimed that the war coalition “is larger than the coalition that existed during the Gulf War in 1991.”
They all buzz…..Alex feels an electric shock shoot through him; shakes. Tries another question.

Umm..who claimed in September 2002 that an International Atomic Energy Agency report stated that Iraq was “six months away from developing a nuclear weapon.”

They all buzz…an electric shock goes through Alex…

Umm..who…in October 2002 claimed “Iraq possesses ballistic missiles with a likely range of hundreds of miles – far enough to strike Saudi Arabia, Israel, Turkey and other nations”.

They buzz…and electric shock goes through Alex; he shakes, rattles.

Um..who claimed that in his October 2002 address to the nation, that Iraq had a growing fleet of unmanned air craft that could be used for missions targeting the United States.

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex reeling. He looks around bewildered. Tries another question.

Who claimed that Saddam Hussein aids and protects terrorists, including members of Al Qaeda and that Iraqi intelligence met with 9-11 hijacker Mohammed Atta in Prague prior to the attacks.

They hit their buzzers…and electric jolt sends Alex reeling and rocking and rolling.

Uh…..who. repeatedly .claimed that…. they had evidence (which the CIA refuted as being a forged document) that Iraq attempted to buy 500 tons of uranium oxide from Niger, which can be used to make fuel for nuclear reactors.

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex …

What the?…..(Alex looks to the heavens for answers; tries again) Who.. claimed… that civilian.. casualties were lowest than they’d ever been in history and that Shock and Awe never meant to hurt innocents?

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex…Alex is bewildered, angry; tries again.

Who claims that that careful science demonstrates that the depleted uranium from the mighty Shock and Awe campaign is no big risk to the population.

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex …

Who…claimed that the looting of Iraqi nuclear facilities was unforeseen and no big deal.

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex… Alex finally falls to his knees.

Groucho Marx falls like a duck from the sky

Groucho: Well, I like my cigar too but I take it out every once in a while (as he waddles off with a wink) It’s the subversive liberals, dummy.

Alex tries again:

Who admitted in a Vanity Fair article: “For bureaucratic reasons we settled on one issue, weapons of mass destruction, because it was the one reason everyone could agree on.’

They buzz….no literal shock this time; just a figurative one as Alex clenches for the burst that doesn’t come.

Alex: Jim?

Jim: Who is Michael Moore?

Alex: No. Virginia?

Virginia: Who is Maureen O’Dowd?

Alex: No.

Alfred: Who is Paul Wolfowitz?

Alex: Excellent, yes.

Jim: Yeah, who is he?

Alex: Deputy Secretary of Offense…

Virginia: Defense! And anyway who cares about the Deputy?

Alfred: Yeah, and he was taken out of context.

Alex: Yes, lies!

(Several rubber ducks with Groucho glasses fall from the sky; quacking; saying something about AFLAC or Freedonia, hard to tell which; Alex ponders; thinks maybe he’s seen the light)

Alex: Ok, choose, Alfred.

Alfred: Alex, I choose Administration Lies for 500.

Alex: Ok…who claimed we’d be in and out of Iraq in just a few months?

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex reeling.

Alex: OH SHIT NOT AGAIN.

Virginia: (condescendingly) Alex, alex, alex….maybe you’re not so smart after all.

Alex: Who claimed we’d be safer as a nation after…

They buzz…and electric jolt sends Alex to his knees.

Alex: Who said…. that POW Jessica Lynch had sustained multiple gunshot wounds and was stabbed by Iraqi forces and then saved by US Special Forces who stormed the Iraqi hospital and rescued her in the face of heavy hostile fire?

They buzz…and electric jolt topples Alex. He gets up, tries again.

Alex: Who lied about a second attack on US troops at the Gulf of Tonkin in order to launch the Vietnam War?

They buzz…..Alex braces for a shock. No shock. A light comes on. Rubber ducks
fall from the sky; quacking: AFLAC AFLAC FREEDONIA FREEDONIA AFLAC QUACK QUACK

Alex: Virginia?

Virginia: Who is Bill Clinton?

Alex: No, Jim?

Jim: Who was Lyndon Johnson?

Alex: Yes, excellent!

Alfred: He was a Democrat! Only Democrats lie about wars we can’t win!

Virginia: We could’ve won, but he was a pussy!

Alex: Ok, ok..I think I’m getting the hang of this. Who said: I did not sleep with that woman?

Virginia: Who is Bill Clinton?

Alex: Yes, excellent!

Virginia: Administration Lies for 600, Alex!

Alex: Who said Yes but other than that, Mrs. Kennedy, how did you like Dallas?

Silence.

Alex: Ha…Just kidding. Who said I cannot tell a lie. I did not—well let me say—I did chop down the cherry tree.

Jim: George Dubya!

Alex: Correct! And now for the last question, you will have 30 seconds. Please write down the answer in question form. And remember the winner will receive a 45 billion contract for your company to help rebuild Iraq. Ok…how many total lives, Americans and Iraqis, (a buzz goes through him) Ooops…I mean Americans only… I forgot this was a family show…How many brave American soldiers have been lost so far in the conquest of (buzz) umm…liberation of Iraq, up to this point?

Jeopardy music starts. They mark down their answers.

Alex: Virginia?

Virginia: the lowest in the history of modern warfare

Jim: 59

Alfred: 76

Alex: Congratulations, Virginia, you have won the contract for Halliburton!

Now, Ed please tell us what the losers..um…runner ups have won!

Mister Ed: Well, Alex, Alfred you have a won a 45 million contract for World Com, soon to be MCI…And Alfred….you get first dibs on Iran…

Alex: Thanks everyone…we’re out of time…Tune in next week when we play How the Liberals Tried to Take Away My Money, Corrupt Mah Children, Take Away My Guns and My Manifest Destiny and Fuck Up Mah Good American Dream fer Every'body to Be God-Fearing Rich Christians CEPT THE JEWS WHO CAN HELP US FULFILL SCRIPTURE AND PROVIDE GOOD ENTERTAINMENT VALUE ALONG THE WAY.